Originally, I was interested in Eckankar, and "by chance" I came across a movement called Radha Soami Satsang Beas in 1980. A friend of mine happened upon a booklet he found on his parents table. It was called the Inner Voice by Colonel Sanders which gave a basic introduction to Sant Mat. It was fascinating....and I was determined to find out more. I noticed that the owner of the booklet had left his address inside so I went to him to enquire more. His name was Jit Johal, and I spent a few occassions visiting him. He informed me that I should really go to Satsang in London which I duly did. It was there that I met a number of interesting people including some notables such as Nigel North (a famed lutenist who even did some work for David Munrow), and Judith Durham of the Seekers who I use to tower over, and called me Sir on a number of occassion rather than my first,or last name. Another well-known follower, or Satsangi was Martin Shaw, the actor.
Anyway, I was also suprised to find how much had been printed on Sant Mat, and I studied this stuff avidly. Every Sunday I started to regularly attend Satsangs, and I felt at times imbued with a highly subtle version of bliss....I also acted as a sevadar too. This took the shape of myself being a "doorman" at the Satsang Hall (now demolished but used to be fairlyclose to Paddington station).
Near the end of 1980 I wrote a long letter to Maharaj Charan Singh Ji who was the Present Living Master of Radha Soami Satsang Beas. His reply was remarkably comprehensive considering his busy time schedule. He notably complimented me on being a genuine Truth Seeker who was not just interested in intellectual "gymnastics" (as he put in one, or more times in his printed letters in certain Satsang books). This was true even though I came across as something of an "intellectual" to some people.
However, I was suffering from an obssession. Apart from being a determined Seeker After Truth I had a morbid complex about a possible early physical demise before getting initiated into surat shabd yoga by Maharaj Charan Singh Ji. At times, this obssession was driving me mad. I wrote to him about my concern.and he claimed that I should leave everything in Gods hands. Moreover, he made the claim that "....the Master (ie. himself) was only responsible for particular souls assigned to him by God."
All this lead to a bizarre twist of events. For many years I was due to parental pressure not being able to go fully vegatarian, and hence, become an initiate, or Satsangi. Yet, nothing remains the same forever. For a time I lost contact with the London Satsang, and in 1990 I was free to "do my own thing". In effect, I had just left my parents home as they had moved onto Oxford. I rang up a Satsangi friend, and she informed me that Maharaj Charan Singh had just passed on...! I was amazed. Charan was right. I was not meant to be initiated by him! It was to be his successor Baba Gurinder Singh .
PS. There is one thing I would like to add. When I was visting Jit Johal I saw a large photo of Maharaj Charan Singh laughing. Anyway, whilst I was doing some outdoor work at a golf club I was feeling very devotional, and had the sensation of doing everything for the Master as if he were physically present. This seva, or service can raise the conciousness to a high level which it did in my case. The upshot of this was an unexpected "telepathic" flash of the photographic image of Maharaji which shot by me. I rang Mrs."Chip" Wood who was the extremely knowledgeable, and experienced British representative of the Radh Soami Satsang Beas, and appeared to confirm the genuineness of what happened to me. She described it as dhristi, or a "glance" of Grace from the Master.
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..............In 1990 Gurinder Singh was made head of Radha Soami Satsang. I first saw him in the flesh at the huge Satsangs in Birmingham when he was visiting England. This took place in the National Exhibtion Centre, or NEC. Security was high there too with police, and plain clothed detectives keeping an eye on things as the Sikh terrorism was still very much a problem.Gurinder, or more respectfully Babaji gave a number of discourses plus questions, and answers with his booming voice. In the latter sessions l asked him when he was going to start initiation, and whether he would initiate me. Instead of hearing what he actually said I heard something else (ie a bizarre trick of the mind.) He said that he would initiate me but ofcourse he did not actually say that....... The reason for all this was that I was going through a strange phase in life that I had become so obssessed with wanting to get initiation that it was starting to drive me "insane". I was also unnaturally concerned about the possibility of an early death (as mentioned earlier). This would ofcourse mean that I would not get initiated!!
Quite often at Satsang in London, or at the charming local home groups someone I knew , or not know would say that "I was going to die!" The imitation voice was just like that of the speaker...virtually indistinguishable. I should point out that I have never taken drugs, or psychiatric medecine. I believe what happened above was a "by-product" of a certain experience with Eckankar possibly during a "healing" session (see Realization of the Psychic). Ofcourse, esoterically the meaning of "you are going to die" implies not physical death but spiritual rebirth in the material body. Apparently, in withcraft the mental phenomenon of voice imitating someone else, and tricking someone into believing what he, or she is saying is for "real(!)" is not entirely unknown!
Anyway, in 1993 I, along with a batch of people went to recieve Nam under the new Master Babaji ( though physically not present) at Haynes Park near Bedford. This was the UK headquarters of the Radha Soami Satsang Beas. Mrs. "Chip" Wood presided over the initiation, and later everyone was put into circular groups, and taught how to repeat, and pronounce the Five Holy Names.On another occassion, I actually saw Babaji at Haynes Park itself. Some people including myself possibly saw his face changing to that of his previous Master Baba Charan Singh.
I recall once being in the London Satsang, and Babaji suddenly appeared out of the blue, and gave a discourse. This has happened since apparently. He likes now, and again to give unofficial appearances presumably to inspire truth seekers, and satsangis.I felt very devotional during my "honey moon" period before initiation. But I was disappointed after initiation as the power, and aspiration suddenly "disappeared." I felt betrayed, and disheartened. I have come to the conclusion that a real Master must be able to give an initiate before, and AFTER initiation (be it shabd yoga, or whatever) "something to work on". In other words, an awareness at least of some kind of Power working for ones good. It is then that the inititiate increases its Grace via spiritual practice. Without some kind of inner support meditation can be incredibly difficult. It is vital to have some internal "drive", and "inspiration" to continue practice as we are such weak souls.............Many people have complained about this. Some Beas Satsangis have understandably gone to one of the Sant Kirpal Singh groups which claim that one can have "something to work on" in the spiritual sense. This is VITAL!!
As I was starting to move away from Radha Soami Satsang a bizarre number of synchronicities occured with chance meetings with "devotees". The first of these though was in Newbury which I had never been to before. A lady called Iris I recognized from the London Satsang was spotted, and I went upto her, and she comfirmed that she was the very same person. She was suprised to see me. As indicated there were other similiar "chance" meetings which are hard to explain rationally. Yet, it does indicate that somehow we are all interconnected in this Cosmic Drama of Life.....
The most recent one occured in Windsor in 2007. I was sitting next to an elderly Asian tourist who was looking at his young granddaughter . Some of his relatives were around visiting Windsor, and its famous castle. For some reason or other we talked, and the topic of reincarnation, and gurus cropped up. I said I had an interest in both subjects especially the latter. He asked me whether I had a Master. I said I had been initiated into Radha Soami Satsang Beas. He was astonished as he claimed that he was initiate too! He said that I was very lucky to have been initiated by Gurinder Singh as not everyone is!!Apparently, he claimed to be a retired chief of border control in (his name may have been Dhawan but I do not have the exact details with me at the time of writing) India, and knew Mr. Mann who was the "top man" in the organization of Radha Soami Satsang!! Anyway, he gave me his name, and number including that of the latter, and said if I ever I wanted to stay at his home I would be welcome to do so! Will wonders ever cease? Who knows? But synchronicity has played an important part in my life, and not just those instances connected with Radha Soami Satsang Beas.
Another PS!
Just one other "event" in 2005 could be mentioned here. I recall once sitting on a bench in Langley near Slough. An Asian suddenly appeared from behind me, and said, "Your Master is sitting next to you!" I replied I could see no one in the non-physical sense. I did though just about recognize the Asian from a very long time ago. He was an initiate of the Radha Soami Satsang!
"Without some kind of inner support meditation can be incredibly difficult. It is vital to have some internal "drive", and "inspiration" to continue practice as we are such weak souls."
ReplyDeleteLOL.
The Genuine Masters have continually explained how "Kal" and his greatest tool - the mind - were so gifted in keeping seekers from finding their way Home.
It's funny how myself and most of the other 1.2 million followers of Gurinder, Charan, Sawan, etc., somehow were able to believe what we were told by these Masters (might have been because we knew they had actually experienced the very same things they were describing) and were able to go forward on faith alone, yet that faith soon enough was replaced by ample proof of the Truths we had been taught.
Meanwhile, countless others who were sucked in by parlor tricks by a guru whose very own guru did nothing of the sort, currently believe they are on the "Path to Sach Kand" and won't learn the sad facts until they die and can no longer do anything to save themselves.
When, of course, it will be too late to do anything about it.
"I felt very devotional during my "honey moon" period before initiation. But I was disappointed after initiation as the power, and aspiration suddenly "disappeared." I felt betrayed, and disheartened."
ReplyDeleteSo did you by any chance ask Baba Ji something along the lines of that at Haynes Park recently?
Things have been changing for the good since that quote was made. Thanks for your interest.
ReplyDeletehi searle88 ..radhaswami ji
ReplyDeletei am from place kangra near beas in india. hope we can be intouch. looking forqward to hear from u
again radha swami ji
Where can you get initiation in the uk if u dont want to travel to india? Can you apply for initiation by post? any one have any details about this?
ReplyDelete